Author Archives: Emily Rittenberg, Mental Health Counselor

Gift Yourself Presence to Your Heartache

I am in Fundamental Political Shock. Shocked, surprised and sad are just the beginning.  Hurt, deceived, angry, and stupid are also some of the feelings.  I want to hug my children and explain to them…explain what?  Today we are just surviving. The first and last thing I want my kids to learn from today isContinue reading “Gift Yourself Presence to Your Heartache”

Helping Your Child Through Bold Anger: Crisis Management 101

The goal of any intervention is for the child to come away empowered and better able to self-regulate and solve problems without adult help. What one does not want to happen is for a power struggle to ensue.

Practicing Self-Compassion for Genuine Growth

Kids are not born with manuals which leaves parents totally confused at times, but they are somehow born with enlightened knowledge of how to push all of our buttons.  At. Exactly. The. Right. Time.  And while simply being kind to your kids is an obvious virtue, it can be really REALLY hard at times (cue in kidContinue reading “Practicing Self-Compassion for Genuine Growth”

Parenting is Not an Instinct

The idea of the ‘maternal instinct’ is old, tired, and culturally irrelevant in this day and age; what ALL parents–mothers and fathers– must start hearing is that parenting is a muscle and a mindset.  Instinct implies either you’ve got it or you don’t.  Parenting is neither of those things.  If you adapt easier to your roleContinue reading “Parenting is Not an Instinct”

Giving Trust the Conscious Parenting Way

Tonight my husband and I genuinely shocked our 5-year-old son (and ourselves).  He announced he was done eating mid-meal because he was ready for dessert.   He hadn’t touched a bit of his brisket –which he loves — but was excited to eat Nana’s double chocolate layer cake which had been staring him square inContinue reading “Giving Trust the Conscious Parenting Way”

Parenting with Rewards and Intrinsic Motivation

Behavior.  Ah. There is so much noise out there on the internet about how to get your children to behave better.  The commonly accepted way of getting your children to do something usually comes back to what social scientists refer to as Behaviorism.  Behaviorism means conditioning someone to alter certain behavior patterns in spite of thought or feeling.  ThereContinue reading “Parenting with Rewards and Intrinsic Motivation”

Conscious Parenting: A Paradigm Shift

Conscious Parenting (aka. “awakened parenting”) is about having a certain mindset towards raising our children.  It is not a set of simple rules but a whole way of approaching your job as a parent.  It is a paradigm shift from parenting the “old way” through adult power to parenting by seeing our children as our guides.  Dr.Continue reading “Conscious Parenting: A Paradigm Shift”

Rotate the Blame

Even if your children are the best of friends they will inevitably argue fight and blame each other at times.  Even the best parent doesn’t always know who is telling the truth and who did what.  So what do you do in this situation?  Blame the oldest?  Blame the youngest? You can probably justify each.  AccordingContinue reading “Rotate the Blame”

Routines, routines, routines

Starting a new school year means starting new routines.  And like anything with kids, setting developmentally appropriate expectations is imperative.  Remember: clear boundaries are good for kids.  Kids feel safety knowing what is expected of them (yes, even teenagers).  You children’s teachers (whether it be pre-school or high school) use the first few days of schoolContinue reading “Routines, routines, routines”